This Post Brought to You by the Letter M...

I've realized its a good thing that I'm not a drug user (OK, so I suppose I realized that a while ago); come to find out, my in-laws are enablers. Amid the torrent of Sesame Street toys, trains, and clothing that came home in the slightly-larger-than-little car today was a skinny black keyboard - it may seem innocuous enough, but it reality it is enabling my geekiness.
Not only is this post brought to you by the joy that only cookie monster can bring, but its also being written from the comfort of my living room chair, with the output not on the laptop but rather on the TV, and a wireless keyboard in my lap. To squeeze every last bit of geekiness out of this moment that I can, I have The Office playing picture-in-picture in the top right corner. Too bad its a repeat from 2006, and isn't very Christmas-y.
With this level of comfort I may be able to bang out a few extra (read: few) posts - of course, its also a rather comfortable way to play some old school video games, so don't hold your breath...

Right Idea, Wrong President

Maybe if it was one President-not-elected-by-the-people asking another President-not-elected-by-the-people someone would listen... but unfortunately 2001 George Bush is not available for comment.
Maybe you should get yourselves ready. Just an idea.

Return of the Return

Things that annoy me:

1) Babies that fuss for no reason.
2) The newest McDonalds commercial. The one on the radio where the woman won't give the other woman a McD's New England blend coffee until she gets a few questions right, and one of them is guessing the sound of a fog horn, but its not a fog horn, its the Island Queen, BUT THAT'S NOT WHAT THE ISLAND QUEEN SOUNDS LIKE!!!! UGH. Get it right McDonalds. You just guaranteed that I will NEVER buy your New England blend coffee.
3) Christmas shopping being more complicated every time you try to make it less complicated.
4) The Indianapolis Colts.
5) Fussy. Babies. Just sayin' is all.
6) My car.
7) Not having a new car.
8) My car.
9) My fantasy team. It was just AWFUL this year. Scarily bad. I'm really hoping that next year I'm in a coma from July - September, so I can miss the research, draft, and heartache of losing the season within the first 3 weeks.
10) Not being able to stay awake past 10 pm. I have things to watch! I have things to do! But fussy babies wake up at 6, and expect me not only to be awake, but mobile and interested in their problems!

In The Words of Lewis Black

On Boston: "In four days, I experienced five seasons. It was thirty, it was sixty, it was ninety, it was TWELVE! and on the last day, the was lightning and snow... TOGETHER! I don't even think they wrote about that kind of weather in the bible."


Tonight it was snowing. And I saw lightning. Its October 18th. I couldn't have said it better than Lewis did.

Wolf... Uhm Wolf...

So the O'G family just wrapped up an episode of Celebrity Jeopardy (BUCKFUTTERS!!). Wolf Blitzer racked up a score of -$4,600. HOW IS THIS EVEN POSSIBLE? I can't fathom a world in which a prominent news person is... THAT STUPID. I know that there are some dumb news people out there, but -$4,600? Really?

AND YOU LOST TO ANDY RICHTER???

Good bye CNN. You are dead to me.

Three More For You

I can't do much more than non-twitter-retweet this (if that makes any sense, and yes, to me it does) except mention how fantastic the sweater vest is:



I don't have time for any more shows... but I'll still make time for this (even if it does make me ill... then again, wouldn't the unknown remains of 35+ cats make anyone ill?



Also, I know I'm a day late, but its always good to remember, regardless of the day. Via a Sports Guy tweet yesterday, Paul Simon's post 9/11 performance of "The Boxer".



Always loved this song - this is pretty good stuff.

Babyland

For nine months, I had to listen to people constantly tell me that my life was going to be "so different" when Baby Girl was born. I have to say, there were a LOT of things that drove me crazy for nine months, but this may have been one of the most aggravating comments. Why? OF COURSE LIFE IS GONG TO BE DIFFERENT! No one needs to tell me that a small, screaming, sleeping, eating gooey baby is a life-changer. If you had to tell me this, I probably wouldn't be fit to be a parent. Well, I am fit. And I'm not an idiot. (Idiot? No. Do I have a past/present tense problem? Sure. But I'm not an idiot.)

This being said, life is different. That is for sure. But you know what? Life is pretty good.

Sure, I'll have to see this on DVD.



But you know what? I see A LOT of movies on DVD. (OK, that is untrue. I don't see a lot of movies. But I don't see a lot of movies at the theater, and I do want to see this, so I am likely to see it on DVD. But that's OK!!)

I'm also not likely to see these guys when they come around. I'm guessing that they will tour again though. Hey, its not like I've been to one of their concerts in the past 10 years, baby or not I probably wasn't getting around to it this year!

I'm also becoming fairly acquainted with places like these. That is a fairly big adjustment.

But you know what? I'm OK with all of this! Really, I am! That's kind of what I signed up for, what with the whole parenthood thing and all. You know what's great? Watching your baby laugh herself to sleep, because she just figured out what laughing is. (Its apparently something you do at your slightly crazy, funny looking, balding dad. No wonder I laugh so much...)

Not to go around in circles, but as you can see, there is no reason to tell me how different things are. I get it. And more importantly, I'm living it, and its pretty good. Things will be really different when I don't have to hear about it any more.

Haven't seen this ad on TV yet...

And I'm pretty sure you can figure out why. But I have no qualms airing it here!

Return of the Vacation Ramblings

Took me 3 days into my vacation to get the internet working here in Falmouth. Meant to start with the usual glut of vacation posts a bit sooner... but alas 2 month old + being on the CTPP (Committee to Plan Parties) + general laziness = very tardy posting.

I'm the last person to jump on the "Lets Trash Brett Farve" bandwagon. Though the entire world seems to be on it, there's still ample room... that's for devising such a fantastic bandwagon, Packers Fans. I'm sure you were just thinking of yourselves and your size 60 waist, 26 inseam pants, but its really quite plush. I assure you I won't be the first one off the bandwagon.

Could someone please explain to me where this Red Sox season is going? Anyone? Bueller?

Over/Under on TB12 TD passes + Moss TD receptions has to be 60, right? And that plus annoyingly awful, infuriating Joe Buck Fox broadcasts has to be 77?

Don't know how I feel about playlist.com. Seems like stealing. As in, it is... but then again it kind of isn't... Lets just call it ambiguously convenient. And no, I'm not listening to Celine Dion...

Most annoying people of my vacation (thus far) - the people that walk into Wal-Mart in Falmouth, MA and complain that everything is "in a different place". That's what happens when a store remodels. I'm sorry. But I don't want to hear about it. I'm already aggravated trying to find what I'm looking for when its half a store away, I don't want to listen to you complaining. I'm managing to find what I need without opening my mouth. Second most annoying: the people at Wal-Mart that decided to remodel a store in the middle of tourist season. You know, instead of January, like any smart person would. Third most annoying (this is more conceptual than anything): the people at Target who still haven't come "on Cape". Honest to Jesus people, its time for a Target in Falmouth. Bulldoze the Wal-Mart (and its annoying shoppers) if you can't find space elsewhere.

Why is it that the Comcast remote will turn the DVD player on and off when I hit "All On", but when I actually try and turn the DVD player on with the remote, or use helpful functions such as "play" or "fast forward" the remote and DVD player pretend like they never met?

My brother-in-law can drive a golf ball straight 300+ yards. My nephews can out-drive me. I can show up at a golf course successfully. We all have our callings. Unless being really good at chip shots out of the woods and losing a ball of the tee box, taking a drop, and losing another ball into a tall (tall) bush count as skills, golf is not my calling.

But I still want to play the Old Course at St. Andrews before I die.

Further to my earlier point about playlist.com, from their "About" page: "We are in the process of building an index of links to music files posted on webpages that meet reasonable criteria as having the legal right to host music files for streaming to end users". Well that makes me feel better.

I'm not entirely sure how I didn't found about quakelive.com sooner. I think you just lost me for the rest of the night. But I promise to keep the internet working for the rest of vacation.

Anderson Cooper... I mean Draco Malfoy

I'll let the rest speak for itself.
(I'm sure you've figured it out already, but this is your mature content warning)

Over/Under on the Number of My Groomsmen That Could Have Pulled This Off

I get the feeling that the Catholic Church may have frowned upon this though...

What You're Callin' The Cause I Call The Cure

I promise this will be my last bit on this, but this is the best idea I've heard on this topic so far (and I kind of wish I had thought of it). I hope they have their beer, and the rest of us can start to freak out about something else.

RT: Sgt. Crowley

In case you missed it, here's the interview on WEEI with Sgt. Crowley of Professor Gatesgate (though I did come up with that on my own just now, it already appears to be plastered all over the internet. Damn you, information age). I'm not trying to stir things up (read my prior post on this), but if this were a seesaw competition, having President Obama on one side would be like having the 600 lb 4th grader with a pituitary disorder on one side (no offense to Mr. Obama, he appears to be in great shape), so I'm just trying to even things out as best I can.

Turkeylurkey

I realized that I'm fast approaching as many tweets (90) in just a few months, as I am posts (117). As I've never been particularly good at keeping up with either, I don't always enjoy going back into the archives - I usually feel more like a colossal failure than a nostalgic dope (though you can argue I am indeed both). I did find this post rather funny though, in light of recent events (as usual, the video is broken now... damn you corporate America).

The "fambly" will be doing Turkey Day in Keene once again this year, and with the right amount of alcohol and the proper amount of leverage, you mayhaps will get yet another jovial post out of me - unfortunately too much vino and it may not make too much sense. So an updated list is in order:

I'm certainly thankful for a wonderful family, and a healthy one at that. I'll withhold judgment on screaming fits at 2 am, but other than that, 3 is even better than two was (though my proportional ownership in 800 sq. ft. of hell has certainly reduced).

You won't be shocked to hear this, but I'm also thankful that school is over. In retrospect, I don't know how we did it. Ok, to be precise, I don't know how Meghan did it - but I do know that after the torture that is the UMass grad program, she was well equipped for labor and childrearing (if that is a word). I'm half surprised when the nurses commented on how well she did in labor, Meghan didn't just show them her diploma - she'd already been through much worse.

I'm thankful for the creator of the diaper genie. The baby's room smells... not so diapery. Your moderately priced refills are also appreciated.

I'm thankful for Nintendo and its wonderful Wii. Without it this post might be longer, but I have a date with TW10 and a round at TPC Scottsdale. I'm also ecstatic about the new Mario, and I hope Summer will understand that mommy and daddy need special alone time... in order to beat Bowser.

And lastly (for now), I am (still) thankful for you, my faithful following. I know who most of you are, and can guess on a few others ( though some still remain a mystery, and for that reason I don't espouse my views as to why I have a strong preference for New Balance sneakers -- Reebok, you are ok in my book).

Oh, one last thanks - thank you to the ground turkey that was lurking in the freezer tonight - you made a wonderful stirfry, and were the impetus for this retrospective back to 2007.

All The Rage

This story makes me angry.

I've been outraged by it for two days, and every time I think about it, my blood boils even more. It's been on boston.com, CNN, and all over both the liberal and conservative radio stations I enjoy. I'm hoping that by adding my two cents now, I can stop thinking about it in the future.

Here's the long version - I promise I'll get over and under and through the woods and back to my point eventually. Anyway, last week, CBS announced that it is axing WBCN and starting an all sports talk station on the FM dial in Boston. I'm excited about this because for the past year, I have spent my mornings driving to work listening to the seething rants of Dennis & Callahan on WEEI.

If you aren't familiar with D&C, they are a duo that can best be described as Conservative (Dennis) and Just-Shy-of-Neo-Nazi-Conservative (Callahan). This of course may seem strange for a sports talk station, but they have massive following of people that both love and love to hate them. Unless there is a major sports story going on, my ride is usually filled with diatribes against the MA legislature (which I always agree with), Deval Patrick (which I almost always agree with), President Obama (which I sometimes agree with) and liberals in general (lets call that on 50%/50%). Though some listeners agree with them, the majority of callers (affectionately called "moonbats", a term that I wholeheartedly agree with at times) argue with D&C and escalate the "conversation" into an all out yellfest.

As you can imagine, this is just quite awful radio. Though MA has more than its fair share of lunatic liberals, the D&C gestapo is just blatantly wrong about climate change (it isn't a myth), recycling (it really isn't that bad, or that stupid) or liberals (some of them are actually decent people). They are even wrong abut the Bush administration - according to them it wasn't conservative enough. Believe me, it was.

The cure for this awful radio? No, its not calling in and contributing to the nonsense. Its as simple as changing the dial. If the moonbats would only get this, and change the channel, maybe they wouldn't be so incensed. Yet every morning they call in and freak out. The moral of the story? Liberals and conservatives enjoy hating each other as much as they enjoy their own points of view. More broadly, there's a certain subset of the population that enjoys conflict and argument, even if (and especially when) it isn't productive.

And that's what I think we have with the Gates case. Do I think this whole affair is his fault (as opposed to the arresting officers?) Well, I can't say for sure. But based on the police report, and his own admissions, it seems like Gates supplied the lighter and the fuel, and the police officer provided the opportunity for the arson to take place. I'm not saying that Gates wouldn't have been arrested if he had cooperated, but the likelihood would have been much, much less. But by creating a scene - and getting arrested - Gates has created a commotion that is more caustic than it is constructive. Gates apparently likes to fight, and the folks in the media that love a fight are loving to fight over this.

And yet while D&C railed against Gates this morning, I found myself extremely annoyed, even though I find myself leaning more on the side of the 5-oh than that of our dear professor. D&C spewed more hate and anger than the situation needed. Its hard to agree with anyone when all anyone wants to do is be angry.

So I'm looking forward to the debut of WBZ-FM. Maybe with a little more sports, and a lot less rage, I'll enjoy my rides to work just a little bit more. And maybe a few listeners will come with me... but I get the feeling that the majority of D&C's audience will remain, if only because there will be less incentive to talk sports with the sports listeners departing, and more reason to argue over why everyone is wrong.

Wait, is there an infant back there?

I hate these spots. I take them every chance I get. I'm not all about
their forced protected class status. Well now I am a customer with an
infant. I just choose not to bring the infant with me to the store,
but I think I should still qualify.

Summer's going to hate it when she's 7 and I'm still trying to pass her off as a baby...

Moving On

I had hacked out about ¼ of a post about how bad my prior post was, and that I deleted it, when I realized that the post I was writing was equally as terrible. Yikes. Meghan mentioned recently that my blog could be “really good”… but that would of course require posting. Interesting idea. Thinking about that some more, I’ve realized I have a few options:
1) Stop posting all together
2) Maintain this blog, in its current form
3) Do a better job with this blog
4) Start fresh with a new blog that goes in a different (or any) direction

I know that I missed the boat on making my fortune by writing a blog (by about 8 years), but I’ve realized that I’d rather be somewhere between 3 and 4 on the list above than between 1 and 2, which is where I usually am (some may argue that 1 and 2 are redundant. To that I say “eff you Vallone”).

The Ayatollah says no...

Pure Evil, Pedroi-whore and more

Not going down the Cape the past weekend or so has really messed me up... late nights and afternoon relaxing in the back yard are prime blogging times. Ah well, I'll be back soon. I wonder if a 6 week old knows the difference between a stressful week and a relaxing weekend? Hopefully.

One thing that has been keeping my occupied: Tiger Woods PGA Tour 2010. AKA the disc of divorce. Meghan claims that the character I created looks more like Obama than it does me... which is kind of weird. But I do have to agree, it looks NOTHING like me. The Wii is not exceptionally great at making a good me. But the game itself is really fun.
This however is not fun. It is pure hell. And yes, I want to go on vacation there to give it a shot. (Just let the pics scroll for a few seconds. Now THAT is a golf course.)

I made this tonight. It was good, but I'm pretty sure I managed to burn the garlic. Or at least brown it a little too much. As Meghan noted, that was two home-made dinners in a row that I made. And I'm pretty sure my heart would have been better off with this.

Random note, but I'm pretty sure no one has made more money selling themselves since Pretty Woman. Radio, TV, whatever, all I hear is Dustin Pedroia hawking, well, everything. MLB Baseball on the Playstation. Dunkin Donuts. Sullivan Tire. Salem Five Bank. SALEM FIVE BANK? Dustin, I'm pretty sure after the liberties she let you take with her, you owe your MVP trophy a call the next morning.

New link (at least from me) - textsfromlastnight.com. Completely wrong. Don't show your mother or your local clergy person. Keep those rules in mind and enjoy. And yes, I know its been around for a good 5 months, don't blame me for being late to the party. I've still managed to introduce a couple of people to it, so I wasn't the LAST to know about it.

Of course, I'm pretty sure I was the last person to know about Colbert in Iraq... THAT was hilarious. And the guest editorship of Newsweek was well worth a years subscription alone. Check it out on Hulu if you didn't see it last week.

We're counting down at this point people, I don't know what number to start at, but 0:00 is approaching soon. Expect fewer posts before more posts... and by more, I do mean bleary eyed 3 am rants.

That Time of Year

Well, this is the point where I usually bang out about 8 posts and then forget about my blog for another 6 months... yep, its Memorial Day Weekend. And though I have 5 relaxing days this year (a 25% increase over last year), I'm just rolling around to the first post a day and a half in.
So what gives, you may ask?
Well, maybe its just too damn relaxing. Meghan is chilling in the hammock; we did lunch with Senor Bill down in Hyannis, and yesterday was spent getting a few things done (painting a bookshelf, visiting the midwife, ect).much
Or maybe I'm just lazy. I figure that's what most of you will assume anyway, so...

Sadly, my greatest desire right now is to play some boule. I don't know why. But its pretty much all I want to accomplish this weekend. Sadly, I have a few things working against me. My boule partner is 8 months pregnant, which means the idea of throwing a hefty stone about the yard immediately puts her to sleep (similar to many, if not all other activities). Also, I don't actually own a boule set. I understand that there's one across the street at my disposal, and I can easily procure one at many local stores... but that's a lot of effort, especially from the comfort of my chair here in the back yard. So if you are out there reading this over the long weekend, and you are up for some boule, come own down. I'll even spot you two points if you bring your own boule set.

If you aren't interested in the long drive down, well, I guess I have a little more for ya'... I've been hitting up a couple of websites recently. Interfacelift.com has some great wallpapers, which may seem inconsequential to you, as you can find wallpapers anywhere these days, but I've been using the site specifically for their fantastic images that are preformated for dual screens (for work) and also for the iphone. I found the site through another site, lifehacker.com. I haven't poked around lifehacker too much yet, but its already lead me to sites for wallpapers and given me a basic DSLR tutorial... fairly useful that.

Well, that's about all the randomness I can cram into a single post right now. Watch out for (potentially) more this weekend. And, as always, if you can't be good, be safe.